So in five minutes, I have somehow offically decided that I can't deal with it, and that my mother will only get worse in the future. With that decision, and information, I have also decided that I'm not going to take her plea bargain and stay home for college. I simply can not,mentally, do it. I just can't.
One day, you will see me packed up,paid up, and on the road. You reaction will be sad, and utterly depressing. But it is what must be done. "I guess this is what happens when a tornado meets a volcano." See, the problem is, we are too similar to even exist in the same area code(and 315 is a big ass area code). We conflict and clash heads and just get angry at each other, we can't continue this cycle. In all honesty, seeing you twice,maybe three, times a year may even be too much for us.
I really didn't want to make that decision, but recent events have shown me that I have to make these choices. It is going to hurt you, no doubt. And I'm sorry for that; but you always told me to do what is best for me, and to forget about everyone else. Well, you probably never thought that that would mean disconnecting from you. We all have to go our seperate ways, some lengthier than others. And although, we will be disconnected, I still love you. I'm doing this because I love you.
I guess our goodbye will be not only a end but an absolutely magnificent start...to my new life. I have always thought that I would be that one person in the family to live a gazillion miles away, and to come back for random holidays, apparently I was right. I need to start my own life, in my own city, on my own terms.
CJD
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